Divorce is a huge milestone in life that is emotionally charged and often can cause you to lose your composure. Once all the dust has settled from your divorce it is time to take small steps each day to take your life back into your own hands. It is time to forge a new path and create new habits that allow you to live your life to the fullest.Read More
The end of a relationship can be devastating whether you are the one ending it or the one being broken up with. No matter what way you slice it usually the only thing that will help you get over your ex is time. Usually during a break up you will go through multiple stages from depressed and emotional to angry and resentful. Some days will certainly be harder than others but one day you will wake up and your ex won’t be on your mind. You will go through an entire day realizing that they never crossed your mind. We have created a list of 10 signs that your ex is in your rearview.
If you have been married for a while and you are newly divorced the dating world can be an intimidating place. There are so many different platforms out there allowing you to connect with local singles including dating apps, online dating sites and networking events. Now that you are ready to find love again or at least start testing the waters there are some important tips to keep in mind. Read More
- Your profile pic. All of your profile pictures should be normal but flattering, don’t use the best picture of you. The goal is to make sure you are showing your potential dates pictures that reflect you and your lifestyle. You should probably refrain from using any filters or too many editing features that take away from how you look naturally. Make sure to avoid too many group photos because it takes the attention off of you.
- Too much info in profile. Follow the “less is more” rule when it comes to creating your profile. The purpose of your profile is to get potential dates to message you so it is good to leave more to the imagination and be a little mysterious. You need to save something to talk about when you are actually on your date. A good profile should include elements of humor and your personality so people can strike up a conversation with you.
- Your first message. Write something that shows you actually read their profile. Avoid using a generic message for everyone you decide to message because it lacks sincerity. Whatever you do, don’t just say “hi”, this will rarely get you a response and it lacks originality.
- Stating what you don’t want. You do not want to come across as a negative person in your profile so it is best to focus on what you are looking for versus what you are not. Avoid demanding language and try to keep things soft and inviting.
- Don’t go overboard on the first date. For your wallet’s sake do not make it a habit of dropping too much money on your first date. If you are going on multiple dates your budget will feel the pinch. Another reason is to set realistic expectations of what dating you will be like. You do not want to attract people who are interesting in your bank account as opposed to your personality.
- Don’t tell your sob story. This can be a real buzz kill for those potential dates who are excited to read your profile. Over-sharing can certainly deter people from messaging you. Everyone has baggage and a past of their own however your profile is not the place to put your past on blast.
- Spelling Errors. As simple as this sounds it can be a huge turn off if your spelling mistakes get in the way of your message. A quick proofread before sending a message or updating your profile is a simple solution to your problem. Lots of mistakes can be damaging for a first impression and distracting to the point you’re trying to get across.
- Am I doing this for a pick me up? Make sure you are not dating out of fear of being alone. This is a time to enjoy your independence and discover who you are and what path you choose to go on after your divorce. If you are ready to get back into the dating world it is good to be prepared for anything. If you think that dating is all positive you might be let down if rejection happens. Dating can be very exciting and a confidence booster however you can occur speed bumps along the way.
- Am I looking for a serious relationship? This will determine your dating approach when getting back into the single scene. If you are looking for something serious it is a good idea to probe your potential date with the important stuff before hand. Ask them about things that are important to you before setting up a date to make sure you are both on the same page. If you are using online dating resources make it clear what you are looking for to avoid disappointment or wasting your time.
- What can I do differently this time around? Time to ask yourself the tough questions about your past relationship to determine what you did to help it fail. Understanding what your role was in your own divorce will help you figure out what you need to work on to make your next relationship successful. In order for you to build a better future you must learn from your past.
- Do I have time to date? If you have a job and kids it is hard to section off time for yourself nevermind planning a date. Of course your children are your priority but you deserve to make time for yourself to get out there and meet new people. Schedule a date night for yourself even if you don’t have one lined up yet. If you don’t have a date take this time to focus on improving your dating life.
- Am I looking to date multiple individuals at the same time? Tell your date if you are not interesting in a monogamous relationship to clarify what you are looking for. Honesty is the best policy and will help you maintain realistic expectations for your date. You do not want to waste anyone else’s time if they are looking for something more serious when you are interesting in something short term. It is understandable to not be ready for something serious after freshly divorcing, give yourself time to get there.
- What are my deal breakers? Compromising comes with the territory of dating and being in a relationship with another individual. It is good to have an idea of what your deal breakers are so you can avoid investing feelings in someone that will not be the right fit for you. Now that you have gained life experience from the divorce it is time to set your standards and stick by them. You know who you are and what you want from a relationship so make sure you are not settling for anything less than what you deserve.
Dating after divorce can be scary but it can also be exciting and refreshing to meet new people and build new connections. When getting to know someone it is important to decide who you should be investing your time in and who you should be steering clear of. If you know what to look out for it will be easier to determine what you want from a signficant other and avoid wasting your time. We have compiled a list of people divorcee’s should avoid dating.