Am I doing this for a pick me up? Make sure you are not dating out of fear of being alone. This is a time to enjoy your independence and discover who you are and what path you choose to go on after your divorce. If you are ready to get back into the dating world it is good to be prepared for anything. If you think that dating is all positive you might be let down if rejection happens. Dating can be very exciting and a confidence booster however you can occur speed bumps along the way.
Am I looking for a serious relationship?This will determine your dating approach when getting back into the single scene. If you are looking for something serious it is a good idea to probe your potential date with the important stuff before hand. Ask them about things that are important to you before setting up a date to make sure you are both on the same page. If you are using online dating resources make it clear what you are looking for to avoid disappointment or wasting your time.
What can I do differently this time around? Time to ask yourself the tough questions about your past relationship to determine what you did to help it fail. Understanding what your role was in your own divorce will help you figure out what you need to work on to make your next relationship successful. In order for you to build a better future you must learn from your past.
Do I have time to date? If you have a job and kids it is hard to section off time for yourself nevermind planning a date. Of course your children are your priority but you deserve to make time for yourself to get out there and meet new people. Schedule a date night for yourself even if you don’t have one lined up yet. If you don’t have a date take this time to focus on improving your dating life.
Am I looking to date multiple individuals at the same time?Tell your date if you are not interesting in a monogamous relationship to clarify what you are looking for. Honesty is the best policy and will help you maintain realistic expectations for your date. You do not want to waste anyone else’s time if they are looking for something more serious when you are interesting in something short term. It is understandable to not be ready for something serious after freshly divorcing, give yourself time to get there.
What are my deal breakers?Compromising comes with the territory of dating and being in a relationship with another individual. It is good to have an idea of what your deal breakers are so you can avoid investing feelings in someone that will not be the right fit for you. Now that you have gained life experience from the divorce it is time to set your standards and stick by them. You know who you are and what you want from a relationship so make sure you are not settling for anything less than what you deserve.